out ot boredom

i wish i was i child.. thinking nothing but to play around with friends...

all i want it happiness...


tapos bigla ko naman naaalala ung quote na binigay ko sa buong klase when i'm still studying... nakalimutan ko na ung mismong quote pero para sa akin ang meaning nun eh, "dahil you're searching for the happines, you tend to be sad and lalo hindi mo makikita ung happines na gusto mo.." Siguro nga that's the reason why SOMETIMES i tend to be sad, kasi, hindi ko nman hinahanap pero siguro naiinip lang ako kaya minsan malungkot ako...



kaya i WISH i am a CHILD....

>>>>>>sakit ng ulo ko mode<<<<<<<<<<<<

@?????@

i was hoping for something this year...


naiinip na ako pero sa prayers ko every night at kahit kelan ako magpray - i am praying for my happiness (shempre ndi lang naman ung happines ko, mahaba kasi ung prayers ko, ahihihi.).. naiinip na rin kasi ako, gusto ko na rin kasi ang "ma-inlove" ulet.. per0, wala pa binibigay si GoD para sakin... hindi naman ako nagrereklamo (sino ba ako para magreklamo dba?), siguro parang si GoD may gusto pa syang matutunan ako, na ako lang, na mag-isa ko lang matutunan... gusto ko ulet maranasan na magmahal at mahalin... ung kulitan sa text at kapag magkasama... stuff i love doing for someone special - some i love.. nakakamiss pero hindi pa nga ata eto ang tamang panahon... wish ko lang dumating na sya, SOON!... hindi naman po ako masyado demanding GoD, basta kung kelan alam nyo na i am prepared and deserving.. sorry rin Po kasi I'm asking TOO much from You at masyado na akong nangungulit... natatakot lang po ako na baka hindi ko na makaya na pasanin o ikimkim lahat ng feelings ko... wala na rin kasi akong constant confidant, maliban sa Inyo... ayoko naman po na magshare sa family ko, not becuase hindi ako close sa kanila, pero ayoko lang po na makadagdag sa burdens at problems nila.. kaya minsan i rather keep it to myself, even crying at night , sleeping at 3:00 am in the morning... i'm hoping for something that would make me feel so light and happy... i even asked myself, what have i done? i was so d*mn disappointed when i failed You, because, you still want me to hold on... i am...


but sometimes, i get tired and need a rest from feeling so alone... i know i'm not because i have the most wonderful family, not perfect but happy family... i want them to see that Abbie is matured and woman enough to face whatever i am going through... i can't help but cry when i thought nobody cares for me... even a single "How are you?" make a lot of difference.. i can't help but cry then smile, kasi may nakakaalala pa pala sa kin.. i feel so alone kahit there are people who still care and love me... hindi ko na nga alam kung san ako nanggagaling ang feeling na mag-isa ako, for in fact i have ALMOST everything... pero siguro nga, hindi lahat pedeng meron... GoD has its own way of making His people happy...

gusto ko lang na maranasan ulet na mahalin - pero this TIME for REAL not for REEL... ung kayang tanggapin ang AKO at kung ano ang hindi ako.. lahat kahit ng imperfections ko...

un lang...


happiness and peace of mind...



PEACE-LOVE-HAPPINESS!!!